Dear Courtney,
J’adore you. Love you in Versace, love you drooling in the corner in a baby doll dress. Even love your unfairly ignored solo album. Wish that lesbian housewife drama you made with Lili Taylor had ever been released.
But honey, blacking out at parties and then reading about it in The Daily News is not a smart move for a newly re-rehabbed celeb looking to avoid “famous SOLELY for being a train wreck” syndrome. I mean, you’re already famous for being a train wreck. But there are still six or seven people who first think of Live Through This and The People vs. Larry Flynt when your name comes up.
And uh, Court, to be honest, we’d assumed that the Kirstie-style poundage you’ve been rocking lately was a sure sign of sobriety. What’s the fun of heroin without the heroin chic weight loss?
Anyway, now that you’ve regained consciousness, treat yourself to a box of Entenmann’s and, in the same column detailing your misfortune, laugh at the plight of Waiting to Exhale author Terry McMillan, whose gay husband is trying to extort godless sums of money from her. Stay tuned for Angela Bassett in How Stella Lost Her Shirt While Divorcing a DL Brutha.
Love’s memory of hospital visit is faint/Signs Terry is weary [NY Daily News]
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