God bless Minnesota. After a mind numbing week with my wonderful family and an abundance of mayonnaise-ridden holiday food, I can honestly say the only thing I’ve lost is any and all contact with the things I like to write about and you like to read about
And since I promised to start tapping my dirty little fingers as soon as I got back, you’re going to have to settle for a half-assed story that came from my dear mother. She had to tell me about Oprah’s near plane accident because I asked her why her knuckles were so white and what she had done with the gin.
It’s a simple story. Notorious cock jockey Oprah, and her fiercely heterosexual brut-of-a-live-in, Stedman, were taking off in their private jet, when a bird splattered into the windshield, warranting an emergency landing.
Does this mean that it’s time to update the old classic joke?:
Q: What’s the last thing to go through a bird’s head when it hits Oprah’s plane’s window?
A: Its ass.
A: “Wait a minute. Is that Gayle King vacuuming a set of beef curtains? But who….” SPLAT!
Oprah Winfrey’s Jet Emergency [Female First]
i heard that it turned out not to be a bird, but some wear and tear stress thing. they were trying to scapegoat a bird. or scapebird a goat. really it was just a cheap ass windshield because oprah spends all her money on goddamn charity!
pageant shanty?Buddhist breads:club transpires!wool?
pageant shanty?Buddhist breads:club transpires!wool?
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