For normal people, the onslaught of summer means trying to figure out how to become less pale and fat in under two months. For TV stars, in general, it means figuring out a way to stay gainfully employed during hiatus.
And for the cast of Desperate Housewives in particular, it means…well, different things. Marcia Cross and Teri Hatcher will presumably keep busy shooting commercials for 7 Up and planting tabloid stories about their love lives (Teri doesn’t employ a publicist, don’tcha know).
Eva Longoria and recently Oscar-nominated Felicity Huffman, however, plan to actually make movies, although the projects they’ve chosen sound, um…here, you can read:
Eva Longoria is going back home to the Lone Star State. The Texas native is attached to star in Touchstone Pictures’ “Deep in the Heart of Texas.” Touchstone has acquired Pam Buchignati and Lynnette Ramirez’s pitch, which centers on a spoiled Beverly Hills diva (Longoria) who becomes a fish out of water when she is relocated to San Antonio to run the new Latin division of an ad agency. Being completely out of touch with her Mexican roots and speaking not a word of Spanish, she has to win over the gringo urban cowboy who is her new boss, speaks fluent Spanish and is more in touch with her heritage than she is.
Ugh…sounds like My Big Fat Mexican Ad Agency. If Matthew McConaughey or Josh Lucas gets cast as the “gringo urban cowboy,” I promise to gouge my eyes out with a grapefruit spoon rather than even sit through the trailer.
While Eva is busy with her crappy formula star vehicle, Felicity is on board for Georgia Rule, a crappy Garry Marshall chick flick. And check out the train wreck co-stars: Jane Fonda and Lindsay Lohan! In fact, Felicity joins the esteemed pantheon of actresses - including Natasha Richardson, Jamie Lee Curtis and Meryl Streep - who’ve had to convince us that they gave birth to and raised La Lohan.
Kinda makes the whole tranny thing seem easy, doesn’t it?
Longoria gets in touch with ‘Texas’ roots [Hollywood Reporter]
Fonda, Huffman, Lohan have ‘Georgia’ on their mind [Hollywood Reporter via Reuters]
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