Poor Ian Somerhalder. Such high cheekbones, such pouty lips. If women were as pretty as he is, there’d be no reason to be gay.
Sadly, Ian’s camera-ready features - and his dead-on turn as a boxer brief-wearing, Van Der Beek-stalking, yoga-practicing liberal arts college queen in Rules of Attraction - have prevented anyone from assuming he’s anything but a cock-hungry bottom (despite his vehement, often graceless, insistence to the contrary).
Now, like many a closeted male star before him, Somerhalder has gone and gotten himself a beard. No, not Penelope Cruz. Actual, ungroomed facial hair. Plus, check out those sneakers! And do I detect the emergence of a gut?! Abercrombie and Fitch must be getting earth burn from spinning in their graves!
Here’s hoping that Ian’s gay fans take this as a new trend, and that “chubby and disheveled” becomes the new “lanky and pretty.” Just in case, I’m going to have a beer-and-ice-cream float before bed, and promise myself not to exercise tomorrow.
Ian Somerhalder with beard [Famousmales Forums]
Ian Somerhalder clearing the air [Towleroad]
More important that the possible emergence of a gut — and I think it is merely the transformation from the nearly inhuman fourteen-pack concave abdomen that he used to sport into the regular, non-chubby, average Joe stomach — is the strange hair. Looks to me like it’s thinning mightily. When I saw him onstage in November, his hair was quite short. Could it be that he cannot grow it out properly?
He actually appears to be metamorphosizing into Dominic Monaghan before our very eyes.
You know what? I long for the day when a little gut and messy facial hair equals pretty. I’m so sick of skinny people. I plan on getting really chunky in the near future and I’m glad that sommerhalderface is starting what I am certain is going to be a huge trend.
ha! he IS turning into Dominic Monaghan!
All the freaky people make the beauty of the world!