So here’s why I think Lance Armstrong has been piggybacking off Matthew McConaughey’s penchant for public, shirtless photo ops.
America used to feel good about its love for Lance. He won all those races, then beat cancer, then popularized the groundbreaking yellow rubber bracelet that allowed all the chubby hausfraus across the land to make the bold political statement that they too are against cancer. Sure, he left his wife for Sheryl Crow, but who wouldn’t? (I personally wouldn’t feel comfortable dating anyone who’d written a song called “Anything but Down,” but then I’m not missing a ball.)
Then the skies darkened for Lance. Sure, he won more races, but was he using performance-enhancing drugs? The cause-related rubber bracelet craze consigned his yellow ones to obscurity. Worst of all, he dumped Sheryl (was he cheating on her, too?). And then she got cancer. (Coincidence?)
Lance’s image is so tarnished that his handlers have apparently decided that there’s nothing left to do except sell him to the gays. Which explains all the scantily clad outdoor sports with McConaughey and, in one case, McConaughey AND Jake.
You gotta hand it to Lance’s people. They sure know their audience. In fact, I’m pretty sure Chapters 12 - 16 in Gay Niche Marketing for Dummies is all about Jake Gyllenhaal in Spandex.
We know when we’re being pandered to. Doesn’t mean we have to stop enjoying it.
Lance and Matt get all sweaty [TMZ]
McConaugh-hate [PEN15 Club]
Studs in Spandex [TMZ]
Good grief. Get the facts straight, and most of the facts have come straight from Sheryl and Lance in various magazine interviews.
Lance and his wife split before he and Sheryl got together. I tried to find the article where his wife even stated this, but have not so far. But, why waste my time, you don’t care about facts.
When he found out Sheryl had cancer, he offered to be at her side, to help her throught it. She said no. She stated this fact in her recent interview (Vanity Fair as I recall).
For all the public testing he went through over th years, there was never one hint of drug use.
I love how we put famous people on pedestals in this country just so we can try to knock them down. It’s a national pasttime.
Oh, he’s just funnin’ us anon. It put a smile on my face–and I’m down with Lance.
Who knew that Lance is as much of an exhibitionist as Matthew? Doesn’t matter if they’re gay or not, I just hope these publicity whores keep showing it off…The boys are becoming just as shameless as Paris Hilton and Pam Anderson (and in a bygone era, Jayne Mansfield and Marilyn Monroe) - and I say, it’s about time.
Agreed. Now all we need is the male equivalent of th Paris Hilton/Bai Ling pussy-flash-exiting-limo manoeuver and it would be perfect.
That photo of them could ONLY get better if they had matching fanny bags.
ummm…isn’t it just that Austin is a relatively small town for celebrities, and they both have homes there? Seems logical that they have been friends for a long time. why is this news? and, oh yeah: it’s been hotter than hell for months out here…do you jog with a lot of clothes on in the summer?
who are they?