In the wake of the Katie Couric “sputum slap” incident, we’re instituting a banned word list for the PEN15 Club. These are terms that really have no place on this site. They’re cutesy and inane and generally unpleasant, and they seem to have pervaded all corners of the media. They make our skin crawl, and if we ever hire an intern, we won’t be afraid to deliver a vicious face-slapping in the event he or she slips one into a post.
1. Baby bump: We don’t like kids in real life, so we really don’t get all that excited when, say, Naomi Watts is about to have one. And if we were, we’d refer to her distended midsection as just that.
2. Canoodle: This insipid term almost always refers to straight couples who can’t keep their hands off each other and, in the words of Aunt Sassy, we don’t need to see that.
3. Claire Danes: “Dishwater” contains fewer characters, and you only have to press the return key once.
4. Bling: Or any other formerly-ghetto slang that Ryan Seacrest can deliver with a straight face.
5. Belly fat or “unwanted belly fat”: See “baby bump.”
6. Any gay-related compound noun beginning with “tea:” We’re under 60.
Mag: Couric ’slapped’ staffer [Drudge Report]
How about a ban on celebrity couple portmanteaus (eg “Brangelina,” “TomKat,” etc.)? They make my skin crawl with their coy preciousness.
what about crotch fruit?
I second the celebrity compound names